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Warning: This post was published more than 13 years ago.

I keep old posts on the site because sometimes it's interesting to read old content. Not everything that is old is bad. Also, I think people might be interested to track how my views have changed over time: for example, how my strident teenage views have mellowed and matured!

But given the age of this post, please bear in mind:

  • My views might have changed in the 13 years since I wrote this post.
  • This post might use language in ways which I would now consider inappropriate or offensive.
  • Factual information might be outdated.
  • Links might be broken; embedded material might not appear properly.

Many thanks for your understanding.

I know why you read my rubbish. It’s because you love me.

But why do people read utter rubbish such as Zoo Weekly or Nuts (yes, I do know why, I’m just trying – and failing – to sound incredulous).

Quote from Media Guardian article coming up…

“Emap-owned Zoo Weekly began life as the marginally more tabloid of the two, and has managed to inch even further downmarket.

“Highlights in the current issue include an elephant being induced to orgasm (headline: “Jumbo jet”), a spread of graphic pictures of a high-speed racing crash that severed former F1 star Alex Zanardi’s legs (“a gruesome debris of cockpit and flesh flew into the air”) and a picture of the “world’s biggest natural norks”.

“Compared with this, Nuts feels a bit like Readers’ Digest – albeit a Readers’ Digest that just happens to have loads of features about cars. And a French vampire who “drank blood, ate slices of dead people and committed murder. He’s on the loose now…”. Perhaps he’ll get his own column in Zoo. Comedian Mark Thomas used to have a column there himself, but left after one issue because he did not like being surrounded by lots of pictures of naked women. The fact this took him by surprise suggests he does not read too many lads’ mags.”

It’s not even funny. I mean, “Jumbo Jet”? It’s one level of humour below “Ha ha, you said ‘poo'”. People who read this trash should be shot. Or at least severely maimed.

Talking of being severly maimed, or not, I had a lecture today from someone who had a weird accent, pronouncing V’s as W’s, much like the Blackadder scene. It really does grate after a while of being told about taking blood from weins, and people womiting.

I’m off to find some food now.

Originally posted on The LBSC

This 78th post was filed under: Headliner.






More posts worth reading

What I’ve been reading this month (published 10th July 2017)

What I’ve been reading this month (published 2nd June 2017)

What I’ve been reading this month (published 7th May 2017)

Dirty Government incentivised (published 25th June 2005)

A bit more on the election (published 8th May 2005)

Diary for Saturday, 19th April 2008 (published 19th April 2008)

Easy money (published 18th October 2013)


Comments and responses

Comment from bri


by bri

Comment posted at 22:14 on 28th March 2006.

I love Blackadder.

I actually hadn’t heard of either of those sites before reading about them here, but I used to get the Weekly World News every week when I worked an overnight shift. At 3am it was just some goofy crap to read over my fifth cup of Mountian Dew.


Comment from sjhoward (author of the post)


by sjhoward

Comment posted at 22:54 on 28th March 2006.

Zoo Weekly and Nuts are actually magazines, rather than websites. Magazines which have recently become so explicit that they are to be consigned to the top shelf.


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