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This post was filed under: Miscellaneous.

Toothbrush

I needed a toothbrush. So I went to Boots.

Good God, it was complicated. There’s an entire aisle dedicated to them. Toothbrushes! There wasn’t a single one that was ‘just’ a toothbrush. It’s overwhelming. I’ve ended up with a “Colgate Medium Massager”. I’m not sure I want my teeth massaged, but it was the cheapest one there.

I then tried to buy toothpaste, which I thought I might as well get because those Aquafresh pumps get all manked up and go crusty and ewww. So I spotted “Theramed Perfect”, which screams “Unique Stay-Clean Nozzle”. What I don’t understand is why, if it’s so perfect, there are three varieties. Sitting here, it’s occured to me that it is extremely phallic in shape. Perhaps that’s why I was drawn to it. There must be some kind of Freudian analysis to be done (We should ask our resident psychologist, John, but he seems to have died. Or, rather, his participation on here seems to have, though talking to him the other day he probably can’t type following the unfortunate American Pie-esque confusion between lubricant and superglue).

I also visited PoundWorld (just down the road from PoundLand), as it had a large sign in the window saying “SALE – Genuine Reductions throughout the store”. I saw a number of items of interest, and asked an assistant how much they were. She replied, frustratedly, that everything was £1. I asked how it was possibly a sale if everything was the same price as it had already been, and if she could show me where the genuine reductions were. She sighed and walked off. I don’t understand why.

There was one good result of my shopping. I’ve discovered the secret to milk buying…Cravendale. It lasts about three weeks unopened, and a week after you open it, so that’s marvellous. Perhaps milk shouldn’t excite me this much, but it does. I am considering phoning the Cravendale Information Line (0845 600 6688) and making lewd suggestions, it’s that good.

I’ve written a really sarcastic letter to the TV Licensing people, because they keep writing to me telling me they don’t think I’ve got a licence, and I keep ringing them and telling them I have. I’m not entirely sure if it was too much , but I think living alone is making me slowly more eccentric. I’m not sure if that’s a good thing or not. If it makes more shop assistants give up on me and walk off, it’s probably not.

Originally posted on The LBSC

This post was filed under: Miscellaneous.

Back to Uni

I’ve had my first exam. How exciting. It wasn’t that bad…though it was three hours long. I have a five hour one tomorrow (help).

A small building has appeared over Christmas, which is rather impressive – I didn’t think builders were capable of operating at that speed. It hasn’t finished being decorated yet, but according to my College newsletter it will be “a social space with TVs, PCs, newspapers, magazines, coffee and tea. So that’s nice. But then, that’s what I thought the TV room was for… I suppose this is a bit bigger than the TV room though, and will have computers, so that’ll be nice.

All of this is by way of a pre-amble to the following letter, issued by Grey College up in Durham (the only college to have branded underwear, I believe). I think it needs no comment:

grey.JPG

Originally posted on The LBSC

This post was filed under: Exams, University.




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