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Exams

My exams start tomorrow, and I reckon I know a smaller proportion of the stuff I need to for these exams than for any exams I’ve ever done before. There’s no way on earth that anyone can learn everything we’ve covered. But I only need to pass, and I did OK in the January exams and the assignments, so I don’t really need more than about 50%. Manageable, maybe, but I’m still not exactly confident.

Tomorrow is the DIPSE exam (the big, long A-Level Science style paper). How I do will largely depend on what they ask (well, duh).

Tuesday is my first ever Clinical exam (ie with patients). Having never done anything remotely like this before, I’m not sure how it’ll go. It’s a bit of a funny one in that you can get full marks, and still fail if you do something drastic (like start swearing or wearing inappropriate clothes).

Wednesday is the OSCE exams, which most people hate but I quite like. Bascially, it consists of lots of little papers which you have five minutes to complete. You do the paper, they blow a whistle and you move to the next desk and do the next paper. I like them because if you haven’t got a clue, you can just waffle for five minutes and write complete guesses, and you’re not sat there for a long time wondering about it. You just go with your gut feeling. This is also the exam with the anatomy in it, where you have thirty seconds to answer the question before you move on. This is particularly confusing because you have to remember which way to move round the room, as well as the few things you actually know. Everyone also knows the anatomy staff really well, so you just know they’ll be laughing at your answers if they’re totally useless. That bit, I don’t particularly like.

Then it’s Friday, which is the multiple choice paper, which includes multiple choice questions (surprisingly), some of which have up to 15 different options (though most have only four or five), and also true or false questions. These aren’t too bad, because you either know it or you guess, UNLESS they decide to set a negatively marked paper, in which case I’ll probably wet myself and cry (at the same time).

If I pass, then everything is rosy. If I fail, it’s a bit of a kick in the nuts because it means I have to come back in August and do everything again. But if I’m borderline, then I face the head-exploding concept of a viva, where a panel of three/four people fire questions about ANYTHING on the course at me, and expect me to sit there and answer. Worse still, I won’t find out if I’ve got a viva until about an hour before they start. Major eek. This also means I’ll be having nightmares from now until June 10th, the day of the vivas.

Luckily, though, shortly after June 10th I should (hopefully) be going away with some friends to the weekend. The destination is as yet to be confirmed, but Dublin looks likely. Which will be nice.

So that’s what this week will be like for me.

Originally posted on The LBSC

This 91st post was filed under: Exams, University.

Chicken

www.subservientchicken.com

If this isn’t the most entertaining thing I’ve seen in the last hour, then paint my nipples and call me Rita.

Originally posted on The LBSC

This 90th post was filed under: Miscellaneous.

Free Wigs

I’m off to a Pharmacology Party tonight. This basically means I’m going to a friend’s house to do some pharmacology, but the ‘party’ suffix makes it sound more exciting.

My house is coming along nicely, the new windows are in, the kitchen is in, and a lot of decoration has been done. Unfortunately, the bathroom hasn’t been built yet, but I suspose that’s a relatively minor issue. We have requested some seating for outside, which should be nice, and a barbeque (which should be interesting, at least). The weird walls in stupid places have gone, and the burglar alarm is in. It will be nice to be able to sleep in a double bed.

Due to me being a penniless student, I’ve had an HC2 certificate through today to give me free NHS prescriptions, dental care, wigs (!), sight tests, travel to and from hospital and so on. Paradoxically, the bank have increased my credit card and overdraft limits, and Egg are sending me a credit card.

Should I want to, I could go out tomorrow and spend more than £3000 of money I don’t have. And I’m already £3000 in student debts, soon to be £6070. So my financial status is…erm…well…poor.

I have exams next week. Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday and Friday, about 16 hours altogether. This is fairly scary, as I barely know enough to fill one hour. I have put in for Mitigating Circumstances though because of my ears (which have now recovered), so perhaps I’ll be alright.

On the flip side, I finish for summer a week tomorrow, which means that (other than one or two small commitments) I will be off until October. Which means I’ll have to get some kind of employment, which is a depressing thought. Maybe I should pretend to be JRC and nick his jobs. No-one will notice, we look so alike. Any suggestions for jobs that won’t make me want to resort to physical violence?

I’ve developed an unhealthy liking for coloured pens, with much of my work now being done in either felt tips or colourful gel pens.

I now have The Day Today on DVD, which is really excellent, and also Look Around You, which I also think is fantastic. “Eating Turkey at Christmas Like Nailing an Egg to the Cross Says Bishop” and “Headmaster Suspended for using Big Faced Child as Satellite Dish” a-go-go.

Eurovision Semis last night. I laughed so much that someone who phoned me thought I was crying.

And so to tomorrow: The last lectures of my first year. I’ll be half way to being hospital-based. With just one more year of knowledge, the ill and diseased people of the North-East (anywhere from Stockton to Tyneside to Hartlepool and everywhere in between) might meet me. Tee hee.

So some woman wants the law changed because her daughter had an abortion without her knowledge. Has she not perhaps asked herself why her daughter didn’t tell her? Perhaps the problem begins at the family level, rather than in the letter of the law. And personally, I think it’s quite right. In every interview I’ve seen, the mother has said that she had to sign two consent form for an appendectomy, and yet wasn’t consulted on the abortion. Perhaps in the twelve months between these operations the girl may have, well, matured? These things happen, and her daughter is clearly no longer a child.

The family solicitor is claiming that the girl changed her mind and now regrets the decision because she ‘might’ have not been told something that she later found out and which changed her mind. Does she not think that in this particular case the doctors involved will have done their very best to stick to the guidelines as closely as possible, explaining everything to the best of their ability?

To me, this seems to be a case of a mother taking legal action against the health service for her poor relationship with her daughter.

On another topic entirely, Eddie Mair was clearly the right choice for the new 7 O’Clock News on BBC Three. He’s very good. And so’s the show.

Yesterday I was forwarded a copy of the full video of Nick Berg’s beheading, and frankly, I wish I hadn’t been. It’s really not something I wanted to see, and it made me feel quite ill. I realise that we’ve done some terrible things in Iraq, far more terrible than even this, but that doesn’t make either action right.

And as for the Mirror, who have published some truly dodgy photos, accept no argument that they did this to highlight any kind of abuse. After all, they paid £5000 for the photos…and then charged everybody who reprinted them… £5000. Thanks for highlighting this so selflessly, Piers.

Originally posted on The LBSC

This 89th post was filed under: Miscellaneous, University.

First Anniversary

To mark the special occasion of the First Anniversary of my First Post on the LBSC, I shall repost the Genesis of my time on this board…

Spam

I’m a reasonable guy. No, really, I am. But there’s something I don’t get. Since the beginning of April, via the wonders of spam, I have been offered:
– 3312 hours free online with AOL
– 45 dates with singles in my area
– 2250 business cards saving me £675
– Almost 5ft of penis extensions
– A 17inch increase in penis girth
– 16 sets of Iraq’s Most Wanted playing cards
– 23 bj’s
– 62 refinance mortgages
– 64 free mobile phones

Can someone explain the concept to me using small words and visual aids?

So what’s changed since this time last year?

  • I get a lot more spam, though not so many Penis Extensions any more.
  • I have a nephew
  • I have five more A-Levels
  • I have seven months of medical training
  • I’m a little less reasonable, and a little more eccentric
  • I now have one of the mobile phone contracts whose adverts used to annoy me
  • I’m a year older
  • My email address has changed
  • I have much larger debts
  • I no longer work at Homebase
  • I still post on here
  • I’ve developed an un(?)healthy liking for Apple Juice
  • I spend most of my time in a completely different part of the country
  • For the most part, I have completely different friends
  • I tend to get headaches more frequently
  • I shower, rather than bath, more often
  • I still eat Honey Loops for breakfast
  • I now drink from plastic cups and eat off paper plates
  • I get out more

So there you go.

Just in case you’re worried, this post isn’t coming to you live, it was pre-recorded last week. I don’t usually pre-record my posts, but I wanted this one to be just right.

Originally posted on The LBSC

This 88th post was filed under: Miscellaneous.


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