About me
Bookshop

Get new posts by email.

About me

Website (Part Two)

I moved my website, as I’ve already told you (weren’t you listening?) It’s completely incompatible with most browsers’ security settings, and has one of the slowest loading times and worst page designs of any site I regularly visit. Imagine my surprise, then, when I log into my stats area and find that in the ten days since I put it up, my site has received 1464 hits.

This scares me – Who wants to see the same content as me? Surely there aren’t that many people out there who want to reference Fame Academy news, The LBSC and American TV News amongst other stuff? It scares me, because I thought my interests were a fairly unique combination – but the stats clearly show not only a scary number of hits, but also that the majority of visitors return. But I have made a special logo to celebrate, and even in my current, slightly inebriated, state I know it looks crap. But then, at least it makes a change.

Another thing that surprised me – Lloyds TSB online banking is ‘closed’ between midnight and 4am every day. Surely that defeats the object – No-one wants 20hr internet banking, what’s wrong with 24hr? What do they do for those four hours? If it wasn’t a regular thing, I’d think it was a system update, but obviously not…

The summer holidays are here, which means that annoying numbers of small individuals are flooding the streets. This annoys me. I’m beginning to seriously consider painting large boils all over my body before going out of the house, since I would assume that people would not then walk right into you – Christmas and Summer are the only times of year when being a leper might have strong advantages. I’m beginning to truly understand why people would actually want to go to Tesco at 3am.

Am I the only person in the country who thinks it’s wrong to says that it’s “good” that Saddam Hussein’s sons are dead? Surely it can never be a good thing that someone has been killed. Their father may have had some, well, warped ideas, but why is it right to celebrate the death of two fellow human beings? Surely that just lowers our moral standards to the same level as those we are apparently trying to destroy.

And another thing – if anyone has contacts at the ITV News, please tell the script writers to actually write in full sentences. It annoys me immensely the way they talk like newspaper headlines when doing the headlines package at the beginning of their programmes – would it really take much longer to speak in full sentences? They manage on every other news programme. I don’t actually watch the ITV News, so perhaps I have no real right to comment, but when it’s on in the background it annoys me.

This amused me greatly, as does pretty much anything about Norway. This seemed funny too, just because the thought of an elephant down a well makes me laugh. This may be something to do with it being 3.19am right now, which suggests that I may not be of completely sound mind.

Anyway, I think I should probably stop typing now before I give some deeply psychological revelation about my inner psyche, or basically make more of an idiot of myself as I probably have already – I’ll leave it till the morning, which is technically later today, to decide, so this post might disappear then.

Big Sloppy Kisses,

tillyoshea

Originally posted on The LBSC

This post was filed under: Media, Technology.

Nigerian Email Scams

This post was filed under: Technology.

Domain Names

Given my hatred for all forms of desecration of the English language, imagine my mirth at the following tale of woe…

The Territorial Army started a “Get Fitta” campaign recently, registering the domain name www.GetFitta.com. Nothing funny there.

The TA were very confused, then, when the majority of the hits were coming from Sweden. Why? Because “Fitta” is Swedish for…well…click here and find out. And while you’re there, just stare in awe at the fact that anybody actually wrote that page. You really can find anything on the internet. Apart from www.GetFitta.com which has now been taken down. Wonder why?

There was one domain name registration story this week that was even funnier.

Italy has its own fork lift truck charger battery manufacturer called Powergen. (Can you see where I’m going with this?) To distinguish themselves from the English Powergen electricity supplier, they tagged “Italia” onto their name. They now own the somewhat unfortunate domain www.powergenitalia.com

Well it amused me.

Just as a final thought (very Jerry Springer), the first Icelandic version of the old email Nigerian 419 scam has started circulating. It contains the text:

“I am not a Nigerian and this proposal has no liking as such. I therefore politely but seriously request that you do not treat this as one of these junks you may have heard about.”

That’s me convinced…

Originally posted on The LBSC

This post was filed under: Technology.

Spam

I’m a reasonable guy. No, really, I am. But there’s something I don’t get. Since the beginning of April, via the wonders of spam, I have been offered:

  • 3312 hours free online with AOL
  • 45 dates with singles in my area
  • 2250 business cards saving me £675
  • Almost 5ft of penis extensions
  • A 17inch increase in penis girth
  • 16 sets of Iraq’s Most Wanted playing cards
  • 23 bj’s
  • 62 refinance mortgages
  • 64 free mobile phones

Can someone explain the concept to me using small words and visual aids?

Originally posted on The LBSC

This post was filed under: Technology.




The content of this site is copyright protected by a Creative Commons License, with some rights reserved. All trademarks, images and logos remain the property of their respective owners. The accuracy of information on this site is in no way guaranteed. Opinions expressed are solely those of the author. No responsibility can be accepted for any loss or damage caused by reliance on the information provided by this site. Information about cookies and the handling of emails submitted for the 'new posts by email' service can be found in the privacy policy. This site uses affiliate links: if you buy something via a link on this site, I might get a small percentage in commission. Here's hoping.