Badscience is in possession of the BBC’s ranking of which swearwords are most offensive, and which least offensive, out of the 28 words it defines as swearwords. It also has a comparative ranking from 1998. The only change to the top five is that ‘nigger’ is now much more offensive.

Anyhow, it’s a very entertaining and somewhat enlightening list to read. So here it is:

I do hope that made you smile!

David Miliband has a blog. A blog that cost the taxpayer £6,000. And isn’t allowed to contain political comments.

Question one: How on earth did it cost £6,000 to set up? That’s hundreds times more than this blog has cost in it’s entire lifespan, and there are a great many tools out there (WordPress.com and Blogger, for example) that would have allowed him to do the same for nothing.

Question two: What’s the point? A politician sets up a blog that can’t have political comments on it?

Question three: Can I have my money back, please?

To be fair, he does attempt to answer one of the above three questions in his blurb:

This blog is my attempt to help bridge the gap – the growing and potentially dangerous gap – between politicians and the public. It will show some of what I’m doing, what I’m thinking about, and what I’ve read, heard or seen for myself which has sparked interest or influenced my ideas.

I’m not entirely sure who Mr Miliband thinks will read his blog, and I’m slightly scared that the fact I’ve visited it will be one more hit towards the definition of success. And quite how he’s going to tell us what he’s thinking as a politician without making political comments is unclear. But I’m sure this is a good use of taxpayer’s money…!

Even Boris can do it better…

There’s really nothing that needs adding to this. So I won’t add anything.

Zacarias Moussaoui is eligible for the death penalty, according to a US jury. You would hope that the death penalty would be reserved for the most horrendous crimes. Moussaoui didn’t kill anyone, or even harm anyone. He just lied to the FBI.

The consequences of those lies were terrible (if, of course, we assume his full confession would have prevented the attack – which is far from given). But he didn’t actually do it. He knew about it, any didn’t tell anybody. That probably applies to a great many people. You can’t plan something like this without a large number of people knowing; and yet, Moussaoui is eligible to be murdered by the state. It’s not even clear that he was actually involved in 9/11.

Capital punishment is wrong at the very best of times. In situations like this, it is doubtlessly brutal murder – all the more brutal than that on 9/11 because it is sanctioned by the state.

SOCA (Serious Organised Crime Agency) has launched today. No doubt they’ll lock up all the naughty criminals, probably without trial. In fact, they might just start detaining people at birth, or killing everyone with a padded jacket. After all, from a flashy (expensive) looking press-room, Mr Blair annoucned they’re going to make life ‘hell’ for ‘Mr Bigs’. The easiest, most-efficient way to do this is to shoot or detain everyone who looks a little bit dodgy. So that’s probably what’ll happen.

And they have a fantastically New Labour target: “To reduce harm”. Prove they’ve suceeded or failed at that!

But what about all the criminals who aren’t serious? What about those who are just killing people for a bit of a laugh? They’re going to thrive! Poisonous custard-pie throwings a-go-go! I think the government have missed a trick… and made an appropriate acronym: After all, crime is all a bit of a political sport to Mr Blair.

I am deligted to announce that, as of today (1st April), this blog has become part of the Google Family.

Following on from our awards and recognition earlier in the year as one of the most comprehensive, amusing, and authoratative blogs on the web, a multi-million pound deal has been agreed with Google. The deal will see me continuing to work on the site, though now full time from a new base in New York.

I will be taking a short break from posting – Olaf Priol, the former Guardian columnist who leaves the newspaper on a high after today’s front page exclusive, will be filling in for the next fortnight, before joining the site permanently after the summer.

Thank you for all your support over the years – it’s great to see that the site’s true worth has finally been recognised. I hope that the support will continue into this new, incredible era for the site.

For more information on the deal, please see this new section of the site.

Hoax posted for April Fools’ Day 2006