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Bonsai Kittens

Hold up!

See that little date above?

This post was published years ago.

My opinions have changed over time: I think it's quite fun to keep old posts online so that you can see how that has happened. The downside is that there are posts on this site that express views that I now find offensive, or use language in ways I'd never dream of using it today.

I don't believe in airbrushing history, but I do believe that it's important to acknowledge the obvious: some of what I've written in the past has been crap. Some of it was offensive. Some of it was offensively bad. And there's may be some brass among the muck (you can make up your own mind on that).

Some of what I've presented as my own views has been me—wittingly or unwittingly—posturing without having considered all the facts. In a few years, I'll probably think the same about what I'm writing today, and I'm fine with that. Things change. People grow. Society moves forward.

The internet moves on too, which means there might be broken links or embedded content that fails to load. If you're unlucky, that might mean that this post makes no sense at all.

So please consider yourself duly warned: this post is an historical artefact. It's not an exposition of my current views nor a piece of 'content' than necessarily 'works'.

You may now read on... and in most cases, the post you're about to read is considerably shorter than this warning box, so brace for disappointment.

At only a few weeks of age, a kitten’s bones have not yet hardened and become osseous. They are extremely soft and springy. In fact, if you take a week-old kitten and throw it to the floor, it will actually bounce! We do not recommend that you try this at home. The kitten may bounce under the furniture and be difficult to retrieve, as well as covered in unsightly household dust.

I came across bonsaikitten.com after a friend emailed me a petition against it. It’s an absolutely hilarious little site, and the fact that 443 people had signed the aforementioned petition worries me greatly. In case you don’t appreciate the humour, it is a joke, and no kittens were harmed in the making of it. So just enjoy it.

This post was filed under: Miscellaneous.

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Comments and responses

Comment from Sophia


    11.44, 23/06/2005

listen you little shit, it is not funny at all!!! cats should not be treated in this way, nor any other animals!!! the people who do this should be ridiculed with shame, and so should you. It’s torture, it’s murder, its fucking wrong!! How bout i shove you in a glass container and see who you like it you fucked up prick!!


Comment from sjhoward (author of the post)


    11.53, 23/06/2005

Well thanks for that. Once again, I’d point you to the fact that it’s not torture or murder, mainly because it’s not real. It’s a joke. A ha-ha. A funny. No cats have been shoved in little bottles – come on, dear, engage brain. Nobody has been forced into little bottles. The pictures on the site are taken from clever angles and photoshopped.

But, you know, thanks for the comments.


Comment from Engelbert Goldstein


    21.49, 23/06/2005

I trust that Sophia is equally outraged and opposed to the ancient Japanese custom of binding women’s feet.

Of course sites like bonsaikittens.COM are animal exploitation sites and should immediately be reported to PETA.

Perhaps Sophia is a member of PETA, but surely such uncivil, unladylike language is not going to endear anybody to her cause.


Comment from Lydia


    19.23, 26/01/2006

u sick thing


Comment from sjhoward (author of the post)


    16.07, 27/01/2006

Either you didn’t read the full post or the comments, you didn’t understand the fact that this was a joke, or you just think I have a sick sense of humour. I’m hoping its the latter.


Trackback from elsewhere on the site



14:09
17th February 2006.

This post has been referenced by another on this site:
sjhoward.co.uk » The twelve funniest seconds of your day


Comment from mle


    18.35, 10/03/2006

guys this bonsai cat thing isnt true
but neway it is sick thta ne1 wud put this kin dof thing on the web to upset so many people
i personally dont see the funi side in ti nd i think it shud be taken away immediately


Comment from sjhoward (author of the post)


    15.30, 13/03/2006

And, as ever, you are entitled to your opinion.


Comment from Pari


    12.20, 04/07/2006

What is sick is that people get so upset about something that is an illusion, a manipulation of photography. You should all be getting really really upset about what is actually really happening to people at the hands of your democratically elected Western governments. That, boys and girls, is both real and truly sick


Comment from sjhoward (author of the post)


    16.26, 06/07/2006

Very well said.


Comment from rach


    13.18, 27/08/2006

dis iz sik ow cud u do dis 2 livin things especially little kittens it dunt matta if der unharmd or wot they deserved to b treated lyk dis they do av feelings u no, n this iz apsulutely sik, i cnt belive u fink dis funny bcz its nt n if ya fink it iz den u r a sad arsehole ho needs 2 gt a lyf ow wud u lyk it if u wer forced 2 git into a jar or a bottle wen u wer younger if u wz i wud of laugh mi ead off bcz u deserve it nt dem poor little kittens!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


Comment from sjhoward (author of the post)


    17.00, 27/08/2006

if u iz abul 2 weed de info abuv, den u wd relize it iz nt reel, innit!!!!!!! if u cd spk inglish wen psting dat wd b gd 2!!!!!!!!1111111oneoneone


Comment from rebecca


    02.07, 21/10/2007

I came across this site.. and was wondering who made up that joke.. because i really dont see the humor in something like that. My little sister saw it, and was crying for days!!
I know it isnt real, but still.. that is a pretty sick joke.


Comment from cat barrier


    03.01, 20/05/2008

Is this for real? Nice post! I will be saving this page to my favorites for sure.




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