About me
Archive
About me

First Anniversary

close

Hold up! Before you read on, please read this...

This post was published more than 14 years ago

I keep old posts on the site because I often enjoy reading old content on other people's sites. Not everything that is old is bad. It can be interesting to see how views have changed over time: for example, how my strident teenage views have mellowed and matured.

But given the age of this post, please bear in mind:

  • My views might very well have changed in the 14 years since I wrote this post. I have written some very silly things over the years, many of which I find pretty embarrassing today.
  • This post might use language in ways which I would now consider highly inappropriate or offensive.
  • Factual information might be outdated.
  • Links might be broken; embedded material might not appear properly.

Okay. Consider yourself duly warned. Read on...

To mark the special occasion of the First Anniversary of my First Post on the LBSC, I shall repost the Genesis of my time on this board…

Spam

I’m a reasonable guy. No, really, I am. But there’s something I don’t get. Since the beginning of April, via the wonders of spam, I have been offered:
– 3312 hours free online with AOL
– 45 dates with singles in my area
– 2250 business cards saving me £675
– Almost 5ft of penis extensions
– A 17inch increase in penis girth
– 16 sets of Iraq’s Most Wanted playing cards
– 23 bj’s
– 62 refinance mortgages
– 64 free mobile phones

Can someone explain the concept to me using small words and visual aids?

So what’s changed since this time last year?

  • I get a lot more spam, though not so many Penis Extensions any more.
  • I have a nephew
  • I have five more A-Levels
  • I have seven months of medical training
  • I’m a little less reasonable, and a little more eccentric
  • I now have one of the mobile phone contracts whose adverts used to annoy me
  • I’m a year older
  • My email address has changed
  • I have much larger debts
  • I no longer work at Homebase
  • I still post on here
  • I’ve developed an un(?)healthy liking for Apple Juice
  • I spend most of my time in a completely different part of the country
  • For the most part, I have completely different friends
  • I tend to get headaches more frequently
  • I shower, rather than bath, more often
  • I still eat Honey Loops for breakfast
  • I now drink from plastic cups and eat off paper plates
  • I get out more

So there you go.

Just in case you’re worried, this post isn’t coming to you live, it was pre-recorded last week. I don’t usually pre-record my posts, but I wanted this one to be just right.

Originally posted on The LBSC

This 88th post was filed under: Headliner.

More posts worth reading

What I’ve been reading this month (published 3rd December 2018)

What I’ve been reading this month (published 3rd November 2018)

What I’ve been reading this month (published 6th October 2018)

Marmitegate and Marc-Bashing (published 9th February 2004)

Scott Adams’ God’s Debris now available free! (published 15th January 2006)

Can’t be a priest if you’re gay; can if you’re just a bit poofy (published 29th November 2005)

Photo-a-day 138: A19 Tees Viaduct (published 17th May 2012)


Comments and responses

No comments or responses to this article have been published yet.

Compose a new comment



Comment

You may use these tags: <a href="" title=""> <abbr title=""> <acronym title=""> <b> <blockquote cite=""> <cite> <code> <del datetime=""> <em> <i> <q cite=""> <s> <strike> <strong> .

If you would like to display a profile picture beside your comment, sign up for Gravatar, and enter your email address above.

By submitting your comment, you confirm that it conforms to the site's comment policy. Comments are subject to both automatic and human moderation, and may take some time to appear.



The content of this site is copyright protected by a Creative Commons License, with some rights reserved. All trademarks, images and logos remain the property of their respective owners. The accuracy of information on this site is in no way guaranteed. Opinions expressed are solely those of the author. No responsibility can be accepted for any loss or damage caused by reliance on the information provided by this site. This site uses cookies - click here for more information.