On Tuesday, a friend and I were stuck in Newcastle, and were rather bored.  Having been to get some lunch, and having whacked seemingly thousands of moles on Holey Moley on the nearest iPlus Point, we decided to conduct a highly unscientific experiment. 

Over the course of a couple of weeks, we’d noticed that people on the Tyne and Wear Metro look, almost without exception, unhappy.  We determined to walk through the city smiling at people, to see how many would smile back.  After about two-and-a-half hours of experimentation, we had counted five smiles.  And some of those were questionable.

So: Why don’t the people of Newcastle smile?

It could, of course, be that two people suddenly smiling at you whilst walking along is more than a little unnerving, but that’s a boring explanation, and I want to think a little deeper.  It sounds a perfect challenge for the people of the interweb - and where better to challenge them than the all-new Yahoo Answers?

Expect an update in three days’ time (I’ll bump the post up, too).

The Results: 17th September 2006
The definitive answer, according to the Yahoo community, is

Sorry, which Newcastle Upon Tyne is this then?? It is a far cry from the Newcastle that I love!! The people there are lovely and have a fab sense of humour. I work in Longbenton, Newcastle Upon Tyne and I love my job to bits!!! Maybe they sensed that you and your friend didn’t like their beloved City!!!

That’s a little unfortunate, becuase it implies I don’t like Newcastle which couldn’t be further from the truth. It’s a great city, with great people, and that’s why I was surprised enough to make the post in the first place. But hey ho.

Other notable contributions included these gems:

Because they are always drunk on Newcastle Beer.

They are depressed and you would be too if you had to live there.

Take a look in the mirror. I have never found this.

Don’t ever conduct your survey were I live they would probably thump you first then ask you why you smiled next

It’s called stress, anxiety, and all the other things that make up life in 21st century England, its wiped the smile off our faces.

Coz you should be in the Aussie Newcastle. Even with their problems with unemployment and what not, they still have a great football team (rugby league) and one of the prettiest women ever to win a beauty pagent (Jennifer Hawkins Miss Universe 2004).

Lots of food for thought, and most of all lots of fun.

Thanks to all who contributed.

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This post has been referenced by another post on someone else's blog:
Definition Britain » Blog Archive » Welcome to Britain, Not!

[...] I was just thinking about ways to consider this in more depth when I found this post on sjhoward.co.uk that wonders why people in Newcastle won’t smile back to someone smiling in the street. [...]

» This pingback was received at 00:27 on 14 September 06

Because our football team is playing crap at the moment obviously, if your not a Geordie you would not understand.

» This comment was received at 13:30 on 14 September 06

Thanks for the suggestion, Lyle. I’ve now updated the post above with some of the responses Yahoo Answers generated.

Please feel free to continue to use this comments thread if anyone has any further contributions to add.

» This comment was received at 01:14 on 01 October 06

This post has been referenced by another on this site:
sjhoward.co.uk » So what IS religion? The results are in…

[...] If you follow this blog regularly, you’ll remember that on Thursday, I told you that I was going to post a question about religion over at Yahoo Answers. It was a sort of follow-up to this post, but with a slightly bigger, more sensitive topic. [...]

» This pingback was received at 01:05 on 16 January 07

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