I try not to be too judgy. Nothing good comes of it. But some things grind my gears—like seeing chocolate torsades described as chocolate twists. Or so I thought.

I wanted to write about how the word torsade has plummeted in use (it has). I wanted to rant about our waning connection to the original torsade aux chocolat (we’re losing it). I wanted to spiral into etymology—torsade, tort, the beautifully tortuous splenic artery—and not come up for breath.

But then I had a shattering realisation.

Retailers call them “chocolate twists” when they omit the traditional crème pâtissière. There is, if you will, a functional difference between the chocolate twist and the chocolate torsade.

This isn’t a dumbing-down of the language. It’s a dumbing-down of the pastry itself.

I’m not sure what’s worse.