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Hold up! Before you read on, please read this...

This post was published more than 15 years ago

I keep old posts on the site because I often enjoy reading old content on other people's sites. It can be interesting to see how views have changed over time: for example, how my strident teenage views have, to put it mildly, mellowed.

I'm not a believer in brushing the past under the carpet. I've written some offensive rubbish on here in the past: deleting it and pretending it never happened doesn't change that. I hope that stumbling across something that's 15 years old won't offend anyone anew, because I hope that people can understand that what I thought and felt and wrote about then is probably very different to what I think and feel and write about now. It's a relic of an (albeit recent) bygone era.

So, given the age of this post, please bear in mind:

  • My views may well have changed in the last 15 years. I have written some very silly things over the years, many of which I find utterly cringeworthy today.
  • This post might use words or language in ways which I would now consider highly inappropriate, offensive, embarrassing, or all three.
  • Factual information might be outdated.
  • Links might be broken, and embedded material might not appear properly.

Okay. Consider yourself duly warned. Read on...

Culture Vulture notes a Times of India article which claims that Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince contains pornographic double-entendres, including these particular favourites of mine:

‘You see?’ Dumbledore said quietly, holding his wand a little higher. Harry saw a fissure in the cliff into which dark water was swirling. ‘You will not object to getting a little wet?’ ‘No,’ said Harry. ‘Then take off your Invisibility Cloak… and let us take the plunge.’

Lupin burst out laughing. ‘Sometimes you remind me a lot of James. He called it my ‘furry little problem’…

Realistically, is there any book in the world that you couldn’t extract quotes from and put them in a completely different context? Well, perhaps the newly bought Very Hungry Caterpillar.

Perhaps more amusing still is one commenter’s observation on the Culture Vulture website:

hagrid had a giant mother and a human father, If you think that’s hard to fathom, be thankful Rowling didn’t make it the other way around.

Well, that had never occured to me before…

This 701st post was filed under: Book Club.

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Comments and responses

Comment from Anonymous


    22.14, 25/05/2007

cunt


Comment from sjhoward (author of the post)


    22.58, 25/05/2007

Thanks for that, err, “contribution”.


Comment from Ian


    13.53, 02/06/2007

I do wonder about JK sometimes and whether she is trying to write a book with many levels of interpritation. But in reality, things that are written or spoken can often be construed in a different way, often with a double entendre.


Comment from lemmielemmings


    15.36, 05/06/2007

“Harry could see Draco Malfoy banging his goblet on the table. It was a sickening sight”.


Comment from sjhoward (author of the post)


    17.01, 05/06/2007

That’s not a bad one…


Comment from iewhfjsdibf


    16.23, 26/06/2007

wow thats effing HILARIOUSSS!!!!


Comment from hilarious


    21.20, 05/07/2007

a quote from hermione granger:
“Ron, whats got your wand in a knot?”


Comment from sjhoward (author of the post)


    00.11, 07/07/2007

Hey, I like that one! 🙂


Comment from larry potter


    07.40, 25/07/2007

the guy at the top that said cunt is just a real big arse. i figure that if there where less people like them in the world it really wouldnt be so bad.


Comment from Anonymous


    10.12, 25/07/2007

cunt

(hey look mum i’m big and clever!)


Comment from Anonymous


    22.49, 03/08/2007

Cunts a porno word


Comment from The Big Wand


    22.51, 03/08/2007

Hey i like cunts whats wrong with cunts


Comment from stfu buzz off


    13.46, 09/08/2007

cunts are so f%&^ing nice


Comment from cody


    04.38, 12/08/2007

i think you guys are just assholes with nothing better to do then talk bad about jk


Comment from Literature_defender


    12.55, 29/08/2007

It seems to me that people such as yourselves, making rude remarks equal only to your level of intelligence, are merely jealous of the fact that you will NOT be spending the rest of your lives in the comfort that writing the seven greatest selling novels of all time brings. Oh well, what a shame. Also, if the greatest pastime you can come up with is trying to root through a children’s book to investigate alleged pornography, maybe the object of this discussion should be you?


Comment from sjhoward (author of the post)


    16.17, 29/08/2007

I agree that this thread has gone downhill somewhat, but I don’t think I’m jealous… And, as a factual point, the Harry Potter books certainly aren’t the seven bestselling novels of all time – indeed, even Dan Brown’s lamentable Da Vinci Code has sold more copies than four of them.

And I don’t think the greatest pastime I can come up with is trying to root through anything to investigate alleged pornography – I was merely commenting on a Times of India article, in one of well over a thousand posts on this website… Some of which are, of course, collected together in my own book – it’s no Harry Potter, but it’s certainly sold more copies than I expected, and I’d be more than happy to make that the object of the discussion!




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