I’ve had my first exam. How exciting. It wasn’t that bad…though it was three hours long. I have a five hour one tomorrow (help).

A small building has appeared over Christmas, which is rather impressive – I didn’t think builders were capable of operating at that speed. It hasn’t finished being decorated yet, but according to my College newsletter it will be “a social space with TVs, PCs, newspapers, magazines, coffee and tea. So that’s nice. But then, that’s what I thought the TV room was for… I suppose this is a bit bigger than the TV room though, and will have computers, so that’ll be nice.

All of this is by way of a pre-amble to the following letter, issued by Grey College up in Durham (the only college to have branded underwear, I believe). I think it needs no comment:

Originally posted on The LBSC

I’ve just returned from this event, and I’m gloriously drunk (I don’t know how, as I haven’t been drinking). It was very good, all the teams stripped completely (I’d expected some kind of get-out at the end, but all of them did strip absolutely completely so they were standing naked). The winners were the first year girls and second year lads. They were all very good, but how it will feel on Monday working with people who previously stripped in front of you, I’m not sure, but I think it’ll be a bit weird. The local mayor was one of the judges too, which was odd, if the mayor in Southport did anything like that, the local paper would explode.

I also pulled, which is highly amusing given that I was dancing at the time and look something along the lines of David Brent, but without the cult comedy factor. But nevertheless, I pulled someone who nobody seems to know. She wasn’t bad looking, either. Just a shame I was in the middle of a giggling fit, which seemed to ultimately put her off.

I’m off to bed now (alone), I know lots of people have photos, so I’ll have to try and get hold of them to upload.

Nighty night.

Originally posted on The LBSC

I have just come in from Sarah’s birthday party (no, I haven’t been drinking). It was the most fantastically amusing event in a very long time.

After going to her house and having food, we proceeded to play ‘party games’. The first one was sticking stickers with names of objects on each other’s heads and trying to identify said objects, which was fairly normal when you were, say, seven, but strangely unusual when you are sat round with ten students. Obviously, the very fact we were playing this game amused me, but at this point I felt I managed to hide it quite well and respectably.

The laughter flood-gates opened when, after about five minutes, Sarah suggested a new game, the rules of which were “You are only allowed to ask questions”. That’s it. We had to sit and ask questions. The first person to utter a non-question lost. I failed to see the difficulty in this, as we sat in a circle say “Do you like tea?”, “Are snakes harmful?” and “What do you feed hamsters?” The game could have continued ad infinitum. And I was nearly wetting myself with the ridiculousness.

Four of us (Me, the two girls I’m moving in with in September, and another girl) then made our weary way home, with me (as usual) still giggling, and regularly setting everyone else off. I think their general thoughts of me being a psycho weren’t aided by me trying to start the stimulating (I think) conversation of “If you had to kill someone in the room, who would it be?”. I think this is incredibly interesting, but everybody (including JRC) has stared at me like I’m an axe murderer every time I ask it. Never mind.

So the general thought is that most of my friends think I’m mentally unbalanced (nothing new there), and several of my flat mates think I’m pissed since I’m still laughing now.

Anyway, I have some milk that’s off in the fridge that needs throwing out, so I’m off to do that now.

Good night.

Originally posted on The LBSC

I only get to live in halls for a year 🙁 Therefore, I have to find people to share a house with next year. And I have.

As from ten months from now, I should be (very) happily sharing a house with two older women – Jaz and Christina, both first year medics with whom I get on very well – (24 and 21, respectively) who say that they want to “corrupt” me, because I’m too innocent.

I’m looking forward to it.

Originally posted on The LBSC

Last night some friends and I decided to go out and celebrate the end of our exams (yes, they were only one day long, but that’s irrelevant). We decided to go out for tea so we’d be back early, since we had to be in a lecture at 9 this morning. Due to a number of people pulling out at the last minute, it turned out that it was me and three girls who are all good friends (two from my physiology group, and one other medic). So we hopped in a taxi and shortly arrived at TGI Fridays. And it was nice. I should make it clear that I only had one drink. Anyway, the meal was remarkably cheap because our waitress kept making mistakes, so the manager came and apologised, and we ended up paying only £2.50 each for our entire (three course) meal and our drinks. So that was cheap.

We then decided to walk back – it’s not far, but does involve crossing a five-lane road, and, on this occasion also involved me getting stuck on the top of a fence, leading several swimmers in the gym the fence surrounds to think I was some strange pervert, but that’s by-the-by.

We eventually arrived back in one girl’s room, where I drank Apple Juice, from her fridge – she has a full size fridge in her room, how cool is that? I then returned to my room, and I remember nothing after that. Except I must have posted on here, and also got changed and into bed.

The weird thing is, this is not the first time this has happened. A couple of weeks ago, I remember working at my desk, and waking up 2 hours later in bed, having moved all the stuff off my bed onto the floor in neat (well, neat for me) piles. But I don’t remember it. Should I be worried?

Originally posted on The LBSC

I’m currently between exams, having had this morning’s MCQ/TF/EMI/DIPSE paper, and awaiting my OSC(P)E paper this afternoon. This morning’s wasn’t terrible, but there was a fair amount (probably just over half) of educated guessing. And two questions I didn’t have a clue on. Worth 10 marks each. Out of 65. But let’s not dwell on that.

It appears that the evil students at Duck (Durham Universirty Charity Komittee) have stolen our MedSoc fundraising event from last year…They’re organising a Full Monty event. The theiving evil people. But MedSoc has moved on…This year, we’re having Full Monty: The Rivals , which I’m sure will be much more entertaining anyway.

Originally posted on The LBSC

I had my second physiology practical today. This is an entertaining activity, since I’m the only male in the group, which basically means that I end up volunteering each week, which means that I lie down for about three or four hours while four women do strange things to me. Of course, since I’m busy being the subject, they even write all the necessary notes etc. for me.

For some reason, this has a strange effect on my brain. Everytime I say anything, it just comes out, well, wrong. Quotes from this afternoon include “My hand’s going up your skirt” and “I’ll have to tie you to your bed”.

Exams on Monday. Eek.

There was going to be a point to this post, but, frankly, I’ve forgotten what it was. So I’ll just finish this here.

Originally posted on The LBSC

Knowing of JRC’s fondness for any product containing stillborn children, I thought that I would share with you the following information from one of today’s lectures…

Oil of Ulay was originally made from human placentas. And it’s still based on that formulation today. This disturbed me.

Many, if not most, of the perfumes on sale for women contain cervical mucus from animals, as this is (apparently) attractive to men. This disgusted me, but imagine how I felt when the lecturer announced that she used to use her own cervical mucus as perfume – she used to rub it on her neck and behind her ears. This made me feel physically sick.

I was originally going to frame this post in the context of further examples of ignorance, but, on reflection, I though it better to make the observation that a little knowledge can be very, very disturbing.

Originally posted on The LBSC

Today I was going through some work with a fellow student (who shall remain nameless), when we decided to go over the possible complications of a pneumothorax, specifically the potential development of a pyohydropneumothorax – essentially when you get air, water and infected pus in your chest. Not nice

But the particular person I was talking to came out with a somewhat surprising response: “What’s pus?”

It occurs to me that written down, this doesn’t seem that funny, but at the time I was uncontrollably laughing, more than I have laughed in a long time. And it reminded me of a certain Monkey and his inability to understand what “buttered” meant. So there you go.

I’ve also been laughing at Arnie taking his official Oath this evening. Nobody can tell me that they weren’t the least bit tickled by Mr Schwarzenegger taking his Governorship Oath in that accent. I’d love to become President one day, just to take my Oath in a funny voice. Who’d support me? Probably the same people who voted for Arnie…

Originally posted on The LBSC

As a medical student, I have to do a Community Placement. One placement I could be put on is teaching Sex Ed to local school kids . I was discussing with a couple of friends today (both female, as it happens) how you’d go about teaching it. We decided we’d look at some websites. And we were collectively shocked.

I know things are being dumbed down, but really, no wonder teenage pregnancy rates are so high considering some things that people apparently need teaching. Here are some of our findings…

One website, under common condom mistakes, lists “The condom was put on too late”
• On the subject of lube – “Lubricant goes on the outside of the condom”
• On an agony aunt style site – “Can I get pregnant from having a shower with my boyfriend? Rachel, 15”. The answer provided was “Yes”. I would personally suggest that the chances of this are minimal.
• “It is a good idea for a boy to wash his testicles and penis…after he has had a wet dream.”
• “Sanitary towels…are worn by a girl inside her panties.”

By far the most disturbing thing we found described homosexuality as “A sickness that was not like smallpox but no less dangerous and contagious. A sickness of the mind.” The only thing comparably disturbing was sites pedalling the fact that condoms do not prevent HIV (an opinion publicly held by the Pope, too, as it happens). Shocking.

Originally posted on The LBSC